Can We Write Our Own Vows?
Absolutely — And Here’s Why You Should**
One of the most heartfelt moments in any wedding ceremony is the exchanging of vows. It’s the moment the room quiets, emotions rise, and you speak directly to the person you’re about to marry.
So couples often ask me:
“Can we write our own vows?”
The simple answer is:
Yes. Absolutely. In fact, I encourage it.
Your vows are your opportunity to share promises, memories, hopes, and emotions in your own words—making your ceremony truly personal and unforgettable.
Let’s break down what you need to know.
The Legal Bit: One Line You Must Say
In Australia, there is one legal line that must be spoken by each partner.
This line confirms you are entering the marriage freely and in accordance with the Marriage Act.
But beyond that?
Everything else is completely yours to create.
Why Write Your Own Vows?
Writing your own vows allows you to:
❤️ Speak from the heart
Share the moments, quirks, and qualities that make your relationship unique.
❤️ Make your ceremony more personal
Your guests will feel the authenticity and connection in your words.
❤️ Add emotion, humour, or storytelling
Some couples go romantic, others go light-hearted, and some mix both perfectly.
❤️ Create a keepsake
Your vows become words you’ll treasure long after the day is over.
Do We Have to Write Long Vows?
Not at all.
Your vows can be:
Short
Sweet
Funny
Poetic
Deep and emotional
A mix of everything
Some of the most beautiful vows are only a few lines long.
Can You Help Us Write Them?
Absolutely.
As your celebrant, I offer:
Vow-writing templates
Examples for inspiration
Tips for structure and tone
A private review if you want guidance (but no spoilers!)
Individual meetings, as required under the Attorney-General’s guidelines, where we can discuss your vows and ceremony style in detail
My goal is to help you express your feelings clearly and confidently while staying true to who you are as a couple.
Tips for Writing Your Own Vows
Here are a few simple prompts to get you started:
✨ Remember your journey
How did you meet? What changed for you?
✨ Highlight what you love
Their strengths, quirks, habits, values.
✨ Share a promise or two
Real promises that matter to your relationship.
✨ Add personal touches
A shared joke, a hobby, a favourite memory.
✨ Keep it in your voice
Write the way you speak—it feels more genuine.
Can We Keep Our Vows Secret Until the Day?
Definitely.
Many couples choose to surprise each other.
If you’d prefer, you can email your vows to me privately so I can check they’re balanced in tone and length—without giving the other person a sneak peek.
What If We’re Nervous About Reading Them Out Loud?
You’re not alone!
It’s one of the most common wedding-day nerves.
I’ll guide you through:
How to hold your vow card
Where to stand
How to breathe and pace your reading
How to stay present in the moment
I’ll also print your vows onto beautiful vow cards so all you need to do is relax and read.
Final Thoughts
Yes—you can absolutely write your own vows.
And it’s one of the most meaningful ways to make your ceremony personal, emotional, and uniquely yours.
Whether you write pages or paragraphs, poetry or simple promises, your vows are your moment to speak your truth to the person you love.
And I’ll be right there supporting you every step of the way.
